Arkansas Ozark Hillbilly Technology Terms Log On Makin a wood stove hotter. Log Off Don't add no more wood. Monitor Keepin an eye on the wood stove. Download Gettin the farwood off the truk. Mega Hertz When yer not kerful gettin the farwood. Floppy Disc Whatcha git from tryin to carry too much farwood. RAM That thar thing whut splits the farwood. Mouse Pad That hippie talk fer the rat hole. Prompt Whut the mail ain't in the winter time. Windows Whut to shut wen it's cold outside. Screen Whut to shut wen it's blak fly season. Byte Whut them dang flys do. Chip Munchies fer the TV. Micro Chip Whut's in the bottom of the munchie bag. Modem Whut cha did to the hay fields. Dot Matrix Old Dan Matrix's wife. Laptop Whar the kitty sleeps. Keyboard Whar ya hang the dang keys. Software Them dang plastic forks and knifes. Mouse Whut eats the grain in the barn. Mainframe Holds up the barn roof. Port Fancy Flatlander wine Enter Northerner talk fer "C'mon in y'all" Random Access Memory Wen ya cain't 'member whut ya paid fer the rifle when yore wife asks. Hard Drive Gettin home in the winter time. Arkansas Ozark Hillbilly Medical Terminology Benign What you be after you be eight Artery The study of paintings Bacteria Back door to cafeteria Barium What doctors do when patients die Cesarean Section A neighborhood in Rome CATscan Searching for kitty Cauterize Made eye contact with her Colic A sheep dog Coma A punctuation mark D & C Where Washington is Dilate To live long Enema Not a friend Fester Quicker than someone else Fibula A small lie Genital Non-Jewish person G.I. Series World Series of military baseball Hangnail What you hang your coat on Impotent Distinguished, well known Labor Pain Getting hurt at work Medical Staff A Doctor's cane Morbid A higher offer than I bid Nitrates Cheaper than day rates Node I knew it Outpatient A person who has fainted Pap Smear A lie about someone's Pappy Pelvis Second cousin to Elvis Post Operative A letter carrier Recovery Room Place to do upholstery Rectum Damn near killed him Secretion Hiding something Seizure Roman emperor Tablet A small table Terminal Illness Getting sick at the airport Tumor More than one Urine Opposite of you're out Varicose Near by/close by